Did Women Stop Caring About Men?

DEEP3R1
7 min readFeb 11, 2023

Did Women Stop Caring About Men?

In the last couple of years, there is a high amount of content of women expressing discontent with men. Could this be true? Did Women Stop Caring About Men? Now before I can really answer this question, it the answer may need to be considered from perspective. Is this really true or is this just the algorithm serving me up a mix of content?

Since I focus on love and relationships, I may be more apt to see this content. Now, if this is indeed true, let’s go ahead and say it is. This is very troubling. Now I am very careful in how I search and engage with content. I try to like and engage with what I feel is a good proportion of content about healthy love and relationships, and well the relationship problems people post about. Here is the problem, there is a disproportionate amount of content with relationship problems and issues in comparison to content that is talking about healthy love and relationships. Before I sat down to write this I freshly checked to confirm my suspicions of this.

The Shift

There has been an increasing shift in this content since about 2020. It used to be filled mostly with the issues women had with men. In the last two years, men have come on the scene and started being more vocal about their issues with women. There has been a major increase in red pill content on social media. In 2022, we saw this go up 1000%. Could this be the shift of now why there is so much more of this content? I would love to fill this post up with examples, but I do not have that kind of time.

If you follow me, then I am sure you see this as I have reposted some of the content to address it. The rise of the male voice of their displeasure with women has completely blown up. With what seems like retaliation, the women’s voices have gotten even louder. This isn’t good y’all. The shift is in the wrong direction.

What Is Responsible for the Shift?

Many suspect the shift in gender roles, originated with the last few waves of the feminist movement, especially the wave related to Cosmopolitan magazine. I am not going to dissect this, that is for another post. The rise of women has encouraged a shift in roles. You see this through ravings of independence, I make my own money, I do not need a man, I should be equal as a man, etc, etc. I can go on and on. The movement has shifted roles in the black community substantially.

The black community, unlike most other communities, is a matriarchy. Patriarchy which is what the feminist movement was trying to topple, only successfully did that in the black community. A lot of black culture has shifted our society in many ways and even other communities have tried to unsuccessfully make the shift to matriarchy. Others have said, there is an ever increasing shift in how unhappy women are. This is becoming more and more apparent. How do I know? I do not have to go far to see it and hear it from women directly from life experience, coaching women, and them saying it directly in social media.

The Male Voice Rises

Listen, I can take everything that I have said so far and make so much content from it. These are deep social issues, that are rooted back 50 years. I study the relationship and discuss the relationship dynamics between men and women in relationships. These social issues play a major role in the dynamics. I am about moving towards solutions because most people talk about problems and complaints. I am about getting things done!

The rise of the male voice started off on YouTube with a few different content creators doing red pill content. There was one man who single-handedly brought the male voice mainstream, and that was Kevin Samuels. Although some tried to shoe-horn him in, Kevin Samuels was not part of the manosphere. He took on amplifying the male voice, for most notably black men, but for all men. After he died, no one has been able to take his place, but many are trying. There has been an increase in men creating content expressing their displeasure with women.

Men used to be afraid to speak their minds due to fear of loss or ridicule from women. Nobody wants to be in pitchfork nation right? Men have historically treated women and sexual access as a scarcity. Y’all remember 90’s &00’s r&b crying out and singing in the rain right? Their eyes have opened that their selection of available women is a lot bigger than they thought, that women are increasingly more unhappy, and that it is okay to express themselves without shame, and is more okay with seeking therapy for their individual issues. They have now amplified how they feel. It just isn’t the women anymore. Men are also seeing less benefit to marriage and long-term relationships.

Women End More Marriages and Relationships than Men

It is well-established that women end more marriages than men (Braver, Whitley, and Ng 1994; Brinig and Allen 2000; Hewitt 2009; Hewitt, Western, and Baxter 2006; Kalmijn and Poortman 2006). Now you know I gotta post the receipts. This holds true for women ending long-term relationships as well. Now If you want to go more in-depth, the link to the studies is below. Women are more likely than men to end dating relationships; and regardless of who ends the relationship, women are more likely to have anticipated the breakup. This gender difference in desiring and anticipating relationship dissolution may partially explain the gender gap in post-breakup well-being-men fare worse.

Why Do Women Leave?

Rubin, Peplau, and Hill (1981) find that men fall in love more readily than women, while women fall out of love more readily than men. Moreover, contrary to stereotypes of women as more sentimental, they are in fact generally more cautious than men about entering into romantic relationships and quicker to exit a troubled relationship.

Studies show that women tend to be more aware of relationship problems than men. We have all seen the funny list of things that make men and women happy in a relationship. Men have around five, women about twenty-eight. We chuckle, but as simple as women like to think they are, they are not. The more things a person needs to be happy, the more likely when a few of those are missing they become unhappy.

There is a lot of data for reasons for divorce and the most outside of infidelity is “irreconcilable differences.” Now some will say this reason is used to make divorce harder to be contested, but men also see this as women leaving a marriage beyond repair because a woman is unhappy. We are not going to argue that point today though.

Responsibility of Equality

More and more women are saying that they are tired. They feel more burdened with taking on other aspects of trying to be equal to men. The men are saying you asked for equality, you have to take all that comes with it. What has in turn happened is that the men are now speaking louder, pulling back, and requiring more because women have now voiced they expect more of men more than they ever have. The men are fighting this now tooth and nail. Men feel women want the benefits of equality and not the heavy responsibility that it carries.

Men have also stated that women have become more emotionally reserved like men. Less nurturing and less sensitive, just like men. Men have increasingly said women just generally care less about anything but having their own wants and needs fulfilled without taking regard to the feelings and needs of men. Honestly, this is correct for some women to some degree. This can be due to a multitude of reasons. Our culture has become in general more self-centric and entitled. The blur of gender roles has almost placed a level of confusion and animosity between men and women.

Women did not stop caring about men. We are now at a place in our society where many have become more self-centered, absorbed, centric, entitled, and borderline narcissistic. Our society is now teaching us that it is okay to command red-carpet treatment with no reciprocity or minimal effort. That we are to receive first, then maybe consider reciprocation. This is destroying relationships between men and women.

Check out the IN2 Deep Show for more conversation about relationship dynamics.

References

Braver, Sanford L., Marnie Whitley, and Christine Ng. 1994. “Who Divorced Whom? Methodological and Theoretical Issues.” Journal of Divorce & Remarriage 20:1–20.

Brinig, Margaret F. and Douglas W. Allen. 2000. “‘These Boots Are Made for Walking’: Why Most Divorce Filers Are Women.” American Law and Economics Review 2:126–169.

Helgeson, Vicki S. 1994. “Long-Distance Romantic Relationships: Sex Differences in Adjustment and Breakup.” Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin 20:254–265.

Hendy, Helen M., S. Hakan Can, Lauren J. Joseph, and Cory R. Scherer. 2013. “University Students Leaving Relationships(USLR): Scale Development and Gender Differences in Decisions to Leave Romantic Relationships.” Measurement and Evaluation in Counseling and Development 46:232–242.

Hewitt, Belinda. 2009. “Which Spouse Initiates Marital Separation When There Are Children Involved?” Journal of Marriage and Family 71:362–372.

Hewitt, Belinda, Mark Western, and Janeen Baxter. 2006. “Who Decides? The Social Characteristics of Who Initiates Marital Separation.” Journal of Marriage and Family 68:1165–1177.

Kalmijn, Matthijs and Anne-Rigt Poortman. 2006. “His or Her Divorce? The Gendered Nature of Divorce and its Determinants.” European Sociological Review 22:201–214.

McClintock, Elizabeth Aura. 2014. “Why Breakups Are Actually Tougher on Men: A range of studies shows that they’re less steady on their own than women.” in It’s a Man’s, and a Woman’s, World: From mating to gender and sexuality to dating. Psychology Today.

Rubin, Zick, Letitia Anne Peplau, and Charles T. Hill. 1981. “Loving and Leaving: Sex Differences in Romantic Attachments.” Sex Roles 7:821–835.

Originally published at https://deep3r1.com on February 11, 2023.

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DEEP3R1

Certified Master Life Coach of PrattoIogy. I help people become better versions of themselves to attract better partners.